Musafir Biru

bismillah. Okay, so the title is bogus. But I needed one. And that came to mind. Back to what's on my mind. I grew up to the notion that I was never good enough for things, because there was always this pair of eyes following my moves. A pair of condescending eyes.. Anyways, it lead me to feel very inferior about the ripples of my actions. Whether or not my decisions would lead me to approval. It led me to be afraid. Very afraid, of rejection. Because I couldn't take it, facing the same vicious cycle over and over again. To disappoint the owner of those eyes for every step I take. But as I grow up, I realized that, I can't keep living in the shadow. I was, and am, privileged enough to be poured with rains of blessings from the One I love. Alhamdulillah. And with everything I had gotten these past two decades, I believe that fearing about how people perceive me is not how He wanted me to be living the short lit candle He provided. S

bismillah. So I was sitting home one day, and pondered on my life. My whole life. Rethinking everything, and I realised that I spent so much of it sitting in my bubble. And used my I-am-an-introvert lame excuse to get away from my responsibilities. From what I wanna do. It took me a few years of trying and searching to find what I really wanna do in life. I started off wanting to teach, then an engineer, then a doctor. I was so immersed in society's view, that I lost prospect from my goals. Alhamdulillah, I was lucky enough to be given opportunities to try out things. Spent a few years in science school, a couple more in college, trying everything to find my own goals, without anyone else shaping it. And alhamdulillah, I got the chance to have a year gap before enrolling in my degree courses. I found exactly what I want to do during that time. I want to be myself. Even if it meant being different. So, I took a challenge. And my dad was cool enough to lend me