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Berantakan



sudah berhari dada ini berkocak
entah apa yang menggoncangnya
hebat begitu terasa hingga seakan mahu pecah

air mata seolah bertakung namun tiada mengalir
yang tersimpan ini serasa hampir tak tertanggung lagi
dan aku kembali kebingungan

buntu.




kita
menjauh
dalam hati
rindu ini dah tak lagi terbendung

aku ingin memegang tanganmu
berjalan seiringan seperti dahulu
aku ingin memeluk bahumu
semesra yang kita pernah dulu

aku ingin kita jadi satu
macam kita dulu-dulu
ke sana ke mari sentiasa bersatu
tak pernah terpisah, atau menjauh

tapi dosa aku terlampau menggunung tingginya
dan kita makin jauh
jauh melepaskan genggaman yang dulunya erat
dan aku terus menghilang

menghilang dalam kesunyian
menghilang dalam kesepian
menghilang dalam sendirian

uzlah bersama Dia sentiasa menenangkan
tapi rindu ini buat aku berantakan
aku tak lagi mampu jadi ukhti yang diimpikan
langkah payah dan berat tapi aku mahu teruskan perjalanan

kita berdua, kerana Allah mahukan kita bersama
kita terpisah, kerana Allah mahu ajar kita satu benda

ukhti
ukhti
ukhti

rindu ini takkan pernah surut
biar janggal mana sekalipun
biar kekok mana sekalipun
aku akan tetap rinduimu

biar tiada yang faham ikatan kita
biar orang kata kita takkan kekal lama
biar semuanya runtuh sekalipun
aku tetap akan teguh memegang janji kita

kerana termeterainya ia disaksikanNya
tak mengapalah andai lompong atau camping di pertengahan jalan



langkah mencari mardhatillah bersamamu
akan terus aku jejaki





kerana aku terlampau cintakanmu
atas mitsaqan atas nama Yang Satu.



.ukhti, aku rindu.
maafkanaku

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