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Almost.

Today is Mechanics exam. I'm not sure how I did, but Alhamdulillah, Allah helped me. It was very..

Calming.


To have those 95 minutes of busting our brains out, yet He gave me and my friends calmness. So soothing like I was staring at the ocean. Its like I feel the waves pushing and pulling my problems away.
And alhamdulillah, I walked out from the exam hall, full of redha and tawakal.

I fell sleepy not long after. But I wanted to accompany my dear sister to buy some things at the mall. An hour passed, and my eyes keep asking me to shut it.


(i normally sleep for a few moments before Dhuhr)

We waited for our ride, and my brains just won't let my eyes shut.
Yet I almost slept.

I was fasting today. But I didn't eat for suhoor. And I was dead weak, and hungry. I almost break my fast.
Almost.
I was about to buy food when my sister reminded me to keep on fighting. She said to me,

'Didn't you say you wanna be a mujahidah?'

And it hit me. So I kept on going.
Alhamdulillah

As I got home, I fell. Sleeping.

And I almost missed Dhuhr.


I woke up before Asr, and my brains tells me,
'Don't go to the jemaah prayers. You can pray alone, here'

And I almost did.

As I reached the musolla, and the imaam calls on for the prayer, I turned around, and my other sister hugged me. It's like, Allah gives me and my sisters such a longing that we keep asking for hugs.
I planned to stay for awhile, and some other sisters asked my sister to share stories. Like she always does every now and then.
Luckily I stayed to enjoy the love and time.
And I almost missed it.

I went to the cafe before iftar, buying some food for the stomach I've been emptying. Some sisters were making jokes about me and my sister. And when I saw one of my sisters, I teased her until I made herself uncomfortable.
Her smile was gone.


I tried to put that grin back. She almost smiled.
Almost.


These moments we spent thinking of all the 'almost's we faced either it's almost doing it or almost messing it. There are times when we made wrong turns and could't get back. To save the regrets, think what you're gonna do, or say, many times before you actually do it. Ukhuwwah is too precious to be wasted on our mistakes and wrong doings.

the believers are but a single brotherhood. so make peace and reconciliation between your two (contending) brothers; and fear Allah, that you may receive mercy
[49 : 10] 


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